You’re lying on your bed feeling a little dull from red wine, a boulder of gorgeous rich foods in your belly and half a stone heavier than a year ago……. It must be January 1st 2016. It’s an unmistakable feeling, I certainly get it every year. Christmas was great, you promised not to overdo it, yet you did and lying there feeling like a stuffed turkey is what kick starts you into action to become again the lean, mean running machine you know you can be. I felt like that…….on Sunday morning! Oh god it was November 29th, not advent,not yet tipped into December, I felt like those crazy people who got their decorations up this weekend…..I’ve peaked too soon.
Urgent evasive action is needed, the first of my actual Christmas parties is this coming Friday and there’s a stretchy, sparkly black dress to wriggle into and it’s only a size 8. Now the stretchiness might be forgiving but I don’t want to look like an overstuffed bin bag full of leftovers, there’s only so much for the silhouette magic pants can do! I only wore the damn dress once last year it’s been earmarked for the works party for a while, I’m not buying anything else.
Two consecutive three course meals of the most delicious food, one night of home made pasta oozing butter with truffles from Italy, salmon and then a baked sticky toffee cheesecake with toffee sauce and cream. Plus prosecco, red wine, baileys (cos it’s nearly Christmas ) and nibbles. After that I talked myself out of Park Run….I did have to go and collect my ‘Black Friday’ purchase before the queues built up that was a good enough excuse I felt.
A Saturday lunch at a local deli of warm paninis covered in delicious melted cheese and then my turn to entertain on Saturday night. I delved into my new Nigella cook book for the first two courses and finished with my own favourite of chocolate chip panettone pudding and cream. Tonight more champagne, red wine and B52s, I could barely sleep for the wine sweats !
By Sunday morning I felt weighted down with food and dull from drinking. The rain was lashing down and the wind howling. There’s only one thing to do in such a crisis…..kit on, get out there. Two lovely strong Italian coffees didn’t alleviate that feeling of boulder belly ( if you catch my drift) I was going to have to run with it.
Starting off was hard work, I wasn’t feeling it very quickly at all. I tortured myself by making things hilly. Wilford Hill was hard work and the gusts of wind so strong that the rain was slapped into my face like razor haven’t felt that in a long while. I felt good actually punishing myself in this way. Finally the turn to the downhill section. By now I settled into a pace…..a slow one, just a steady 9.4 mm but as red wine was now repeating on me it was the best I had.
Now if I needed proof I’ve let my tone go a bit, thank god for my wind cheater jacket because I felt my leggings creep down and my tee shirt creep up as boulder belly made its bid for freedom. Imagine if I’d had no jacket as the white whale emerged from its Lycra holdings. That is not the belly of the lean mean running machine that clocked a 1.53 half marathon just a few weeks ago.
So time to get a pre Christmas grip on more than just that belly. I’ve peaked too soon, I still have the prime weeks left to demonstrate my eating and drinking prowess. I still have another stretchy dress planned for Christmas Day and Boxing Day ( different guests, they’ll never know) this one is new, I can’t debut it with bolder belly. I still have a Christmas party with fellow runners to attend, I haven’t even planned the frock for that one yet.
If you see me out walking, tell me to run. If you see me running, tell me to go faster and if you see me with a mince pie in my hand any earlier than the week before Christmas , knock it out.