Meet Billy the belly my new running buddy. Happy New Year! 

Happy New Year, I wasn’t going to make any special efforts in Janaury, no crazy diets, no resolutions, just carry on doing what I do. However I must have been under the impression at the time of such thoughts that I was eating like an athlete and running like I was training for a marathon. Reality is I’ve clearly been eating rather more than the miles I’ve run and I’m shocked to find myself 10lb heavier than pre Christmas 2014. Now that’s an issue……the dreaded lardy creep.

Embracing a Park Run on January 2nd, (yes I know there was a Park Run on New Years Day,but having gone to bed well oiled and over fed at 3.45am, a Park Run wasn’t happening 5 hours later! ) I was proud that I splashed through puddles, got my trainers and my legs filthy …… Those who know me know that I fear mud …… And I wasn’t deterred by such wet and quite frankly horrible conditions. Sadly it was only my fifth Park Run and my slowest. Not only that but I wasn’t even in the top 10 ladies. That’s never happened before and I don’t want it to happen again. Unlucky for me I was 13th. That’s 12 other ladies whose willpower against festive excess is clearly more steely than mine.

I knew where I was held back, I never like to compete with a friend and my new best friend just showed up on the morning and definitely slowed me down. Indeed, I felt my new bestie, ‘billy the belly’swinging along with me in tune with my every stride. Now my Shock Absorber sports bra has the old knockers in check, not that even newly porkier me has to worry much in that department and the wobble from my once more ample backside has not returned. Oh yes, Billy is the concentrated source of all excess. I should have known he was going to join me when I first felt the ‘Lycra roll down’ as he tried to get some fresh air of his own during some Autumn runs. Billy mate, you’ve got to go! I’m just not feeling like a runner when you’re with me.

Of course looking back at my ‘year of cake’ seems funny now. All that cake was eaten like a true athlete that means it was unhealthy, empty calories but refuelling! Ha ha just look at some of the FB post images I grabbed and this isn’t all of them just some creamy highlights.


I thought I’d mix things up a bit and throw an exercise class into the mix. I do go to the gym but haven’t done a class in months, well actually it’s an annual event when I decide to mix it up a bit and cross train. It never lasts though, I soon retreat to pavement pounding and pumping iron!  I went for it with Body Attack, the closest thing to Jane Fonda in a thong leotard and leg warmers that David Lloyd has to offer. It’s reminiscent of the good old days of the high impact aerobics of the 80s.  I do remember being totally addicted in my youth in the days when I did look OK in a thong leotard…..check this out from 1989 OMG! And before you ask, no, I don’t still own the outfit and wasn’t wearing it at the weekend !


1989  in my leotard and leg  warmers !

Check out that leotard and leg warmer combo from 1989!


People watching is the best thing ever in a studio class. The alpha female stayed at the front in what was undoubtedly ‘her place’ she was the one with a perfect blonde ponytail and baseball cap on. Why do you need a baseball hat on in a warm studio? ( maybe she was bald underneath like Tom Hanks in Polar Express)

Also amusing was a guy next to her who enthusiastically kept up perfectly. He was coordinated, on time with the beat, knew his grapevines from his supermans and a genuine guy. He didn’t look gay in any way at all ( hideous stereotyping moment there, apologies, but you’d have thought it too ! ) Maybe he was ‘peacocking’ for the alpha female. I hear gyms are hotbeds of sexual shenanigans …….. I must be in the wrong sessions !

This LCA found it easy, you just don’t realise what running dies for your CV fitness. If you’ve got into running more recently, give a class a go to prove to yourself how far you’ve come. I was cautious of the jumping, I don’t want to knacker my delicate knees and new muscles definitely complained the next day from the new moves but was it tough…..none, easy peasy!

So Billy has to go whatever it takes…..I may not be seen on another start line until I’m a lean, mean, running machine.

Categories: Ladies of a Certain Age Running (LCA), Runners Problems

Tags: , , ,

2 replies

  1. So hilarious Justine.Absolutely fabulous.


  2. That’s fantastic, I think Billy has a twin and he’s my best friend

    Liked by 1 person

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